A male friend of mine, (bless him) recently made a heroic effort to convince me that today's all too often practice of "hook ups" is synonomous with dating. "What??!! Dating??" I asked, with a raised eyebrow.. Needless to say, I was unconvinced. Someone coming over to jump into bed with you, or just plain "jump" you, is NOT dating.

 

So what he's trying to sell me, oops I mean tell me, is that some guy that I'm having a fling with, who comes to my house (or me to their's at a prior agreed upon time) is a "Date". I beg to differ.. I jokingly refer to THAT as an "appointment". Alright, sure there's times it's been less than "planned", a little 'spur of the moment', but there's no way, no how that THAT is dating! But man can it be fun.

 

Quick text message: "Door's unlocked, come up to my bedroom". It's just like Delivery!  And yes, I have been on dates.. ACTUAL dates.. they do not fit the description of anything I said above.. Although in some instances, those "dates" are just an elongated form of the cut to the chase "date".. these guys just take you out for dinner first.. and then they look at you, like you're dessert! lol fattened up a little, like a sacrificial lamb.. the idea being, (I'm speculating here) "what a great guy I am.. I took her to a nice place, showed her a good time, made conversation, feigned interest, made sure she had an excellent meal - how could she possibly end the night here??" No trades-ies.. Buying a woman dinner should not be considered an automatic green light for the next stop, "destination; Sex".. Bottom line, if a woman wants to have sex with you, it's not going to come down to how many dinners you went out for unless perhaps she's husband shopping and playing really hard to get or something..

 

Being single, and considered attractive can lead to its own special brand of chaos in a hurry. Yes, lol it has its ups and downs. ( I will save some of the other ups and downs for later, ie; how married men you knew when you were with your ex-loser partner suddenly, and without warning think you want them, how women think you WANT their men, how it's great to be able to do whatever the hell you want, how you can cherry-pick, left right and centre.. you're out of the fishbowl now.. etc etc)

 

Here's a definite downside to being single: You're laid out with a bad cold, flu virus, the whole nine yards - - and you're almost positive its the plague because your fever is SO high it feels like you're never going to see the light of day again... there you are, lifeless on the couch drifting in and out of a sweaty/cold sleep. Feeling "normal" has become a foggy memory. Just thinking about getting up to go to the lav is exhausting, not that there's any point, because you're pretty dehydrated anyway.. That's when it occurs to you. That thought; 'I could be dead or dying and no one but my MOTHER would know or care'.

 

Oh and a few close friends, if you're lucky. Lying there, feeling like your number is surely coming up, you have some time to think. Oh-Oh. You daydream a little "gee wouldn't it be nice if someone (that good looking, sweet boyfriend I don't have) was here taking a little care of poor, sniffling, almost dead, feverish me?". But he doesn't appear.. nobody does.. Then your fever breaks and off you go. You're still alive!! It's business as usual, and that nurseboy/boyfriend or boytoy you were wishing you had?? Whatever. He's nowhere to be seen.. Who was that guy anyway, that I was hallucinating about while my temperature was running dangerously high? Oh yeah, it was Tom Brady.. proof positive that I was delusional.. Here is a cold hard FACT: At no time have any of the men that I "date"  said anything about "in sickness and in health", or "call me when you feel like you're dying - I'm there for you baby, just try getting rid of me in your time of need."  : ) But hey, at least I have my friends.. and I do have a few very good friends! 

 

Adieu for now..
Darling Nikki