Darling Nikki
| 03 February 2009
"She's your adolescent dream, school boy stuff, sticky sweet romance, and she makes you wanna scream, wishin' ya could get inside her pants. So you fantasize away, while you're squeezing her, you thought you heard her sayin' good girls don't, good girls don't, I shouldn't be telling you, good girls don't, but I do".
The Knack
Is promiscuity hard-wired in certain individuals? A universal study concluded that MEN, whether single, married or gay, want more sexual partners than women do. Both Men AND Women in Great Britain are ranked #1 in the "Randy" standings, for their total number of sexual partners and one night stands. Apparently, the women in the UK are becoming more promiscuous than the men. So much for 'studies'. Women have started to act more like men. The gap is narrowing. We couldn't beat you, so I guess we decided to join you. Fathers, lock up your daughters.There's a few reasons that help to explain why (some) people are promiscuous.
It may be one or more of the following (but not limited to) and of course, depending on the person:
1. They really enjoy having sex with different people, and often. (Ummm there's probably a few sex-addicts in this group).
BUTT :).... having said that -
If you're single, you have four choices the way I see it;
A) Celibacy.
B) Having sex with someone who you feel after a few innocent dates "might" become something more (no guarantees there). You could be in for some dry spells on this 'plan'. Keep the toys close by.
C) Go nuts. Randomly f#ck who you want, whenever, whatever, and who's going to care? As long as they don't know each other, (best that way) who's even going to know, unless you tell them??
D) Establish your own little "group" of men (or women) that you know & have been with, and get together with one of them, when it suits.
Note; especially for C) and D): Ideal if this was all presumed to be "safe-sex" because otherwise an STD can paint a pretty clear picture and then you might have to start doing some explaining/inquiring, but the f#cked up thing would be: where to start? Whodunnit?
Not a cool scenario. Lol; Condoms should be law. Like that's gonna happen.
2. Low self-esteem, Insecurity, Attention Seeking; provides a short term 'high' or 'fix' - a temporary feeling of acceptance, redemption. "Ohhh I must be so hot, evvvvverybody wants ME!" The feeling doesn't last. Pssst, see that empty spot beside you sweetie?? He's gone, vapour-trailed. And your phone? It's not broken, he's just not calling you.
3. Fear of committment, & loss of independence, trust issues. It's true, some women (men too) think they "own" you once you're in a relationship. Some think they own you when you're NOT in one!! Why are there so many control-freaks out there??
So you set the dial at "chaotic and short-lived". Love 'em and leave 'em. Next. To reinforce this thought process, is the fact that we all know married people or couples that are NOT happy. Who wants to be in that club?!
Note: I don't think anyone should lose hope that the right person for them really does exist, but it can be like finding a needle in a haystack, especially when you factor in that even if you 'think' you met someone (or know someone) who could be "right", does he/she feel the same way?? Kisses aren't promises. Promises aren't even promises sometimes!
In a healthy relationship, one should not lose one's self, EVER.
4. It can be an "acting out" of sorts. A reckless abandonment. For example; a guy has been betrayed, 'burned', disappointed in the past - even broken hearted. Makes no difference who's "fault" it was that the relationship ended. But worse if he got the walking papers, and felt he gave it his "all". The walls are up and honey, you're persona non grata. You can "visit", but you ain't staying long. "Don't let the door hit you where the Good Lord split you". That dude does not want to feel vulnerable again.
Promiscuity certainly does have to do "with" SEX, but is not entirely sexually motivated. Think of prostitutes. They're not horny, sex craved maniacs. It's a means to an end, & they generally have a troubled past, lost childhood, history of abuse. Their profession of choice goes hand in hand with substance/alcohol dependency.
I could say more, but I think we covered some good ground here. Some things to think about.
Darling Nikki
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