Darling Nikki
| 22 February 2009
"THE GAME"... alright It's fun... some of the time I will admit. I hesitate to call myself a "player" but unwittingly, I suppose that I am?? I didn't mean to be. I was thrown into it - like a mosh pit. I don't even have a "game plan". That's not entirely true. Sometimes I do have a "plan" - and I execute it quite well. Being single has almost turned into a sport. Where's the bench? I need a Time Out sometimes. Temporary waivers, whatever they're called :). And I'm curious; who exactly DID "let the dogs out?". If I had a dime for every stupid comment I've heard or indiscriminate act of pathetic behavior, I'd be RICH. "No" really does mean NO. I've concluded that some of these guys must've been raised by a band of ass picking, rutting chimpanzees, because their mothers sure didn't teach them anything.Things could be pretty outta control here in my world, IF (operative word) I really wanted to walk on the wild side. It would be a revolving door of un-cut bullsh*t.. And BTW; guys - totally off topic but when you're at someone's house, pleeeease PUT THE TOILET SEAT DOWN!!
"Player"- it sounds masculine. And the 'game'??? Geez, how many "One Time At Band Camp" stories is a person supposed to have??? I like it much better when it's going the way I want it to, and that's not always the case. I've had a few smacks and I don't mean the fun kind. As for winning; "the game" doesn't have a 'score' really, so what is there to 'win'?. It would all be a helluva lot more fun if I could rewind ten years - Ex's ass should've been kicked to the curb long before it was.
As for the "learning experience" theory that people refer to, to comfort themselves, or someone else with?? 99% of the time, maybe that's true but in my case, it was a complete waste of time. True, we meet people for a reason. But there's some people that the "reason" is NEVER clear. I will agree, no point in looking back wishing you could change things. So here I am. "Learning". Hit me with your best shot. You can't put a price on freedom.. and freedom?? It's NOT free.
Going to a cottage, visiting a friend in/out of town, hopping on a plane - that's a lot more fun than going to bars. It's just not always possible. Whoever called bars "Meat Markets" was bang on. Sure they're fun once in a while, but usually it's all the same BS, different night. And depending on how late you stay out/up, the next day (or the better part of it) is a write off. Often, (lately) even when there's nothing to stop me from going out, I stay in. I think I need to get arrested. That's another story and I don't mean "arrested" literally. Let's hold that thought.
Darling Nikki
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